Everyday is a holiday

Wyatt came to the conclusion that there is a holiday every month.  I think this is a combo of his eagerness to learn the calendar and Dina's psychopath need to decorate, bake, and celebrate every and any occasion.  Chinese New Year came a little early this year, and that threw February off a bit.  With nearly 2 weeks (read: sarcasm) until Valentine's Day, Joe threw in this little celebrated day:  Groundhog's Day.  

When introduced to Wyatt, and thrown Dina's way, she pondered "How the hell do you celebrate Groundhog's Day?!"  Ignore the innocent face of Joe, because he was clearly an accomplice as he printed out pictures of groundhogs for the kids to color, and then plastered them to the sliding glass door as 'decoration.'

This, not being sufficient for Dina (or her anal-ness) led to a scouring of the internet for ideas and finally ended up with this:  Groundhog Day cupcakes. 

 

Good lord, she's ill.  (And Joe is clearly due for an immunization shot himself).

How to celebrate a milestone

Dina turned 40 earlier this month, and she celebrated in grand style.  She spent the day with the kids at the Apple store.  No, I'm serious.

She also managed to finagle the kids for a bday picture and was kind enough to include me!

She went to a rip-rocking lunch at Benihana!!!  She was particularly pleased when they busted out the tambourine at the end and sang Happy Birthday to her.  Thrilled.

She forced Joe to buy her a cake from SusieCakes (you'll recall last year's debacle where she walked into SusieCakes to buy herself a birthday cake, saw a cute decorated Hello Kitty cake, purchased her cake, and when Joe got home, saw that he brought her the cute decorated Hello Kitty cake that she had seen in the SusieCake's window display).

Do you seem my little face there on the bottom right, saying "Get me up!!!"

And then she went home for naptime to ready herself for a 9pm reservation (which I'm sure she'll blog at The Dish & The Dirt).  But suffice it to say that when she woke up the next morning, she still had a full face of make up on and Joe whined about a hangover the rest of the day.

Well anyway, Happy Birthday Dina, from one bitch to another!!!

Thought for the Day: Who's Jo?

What's up with people thinking that Joe's name is spelled "Jo"?  I mean, I know his name rhymes and all, but his name is Joseph To.  Do you usually shorten Joseph to "Jo"?  Just because your last name rhymes means that your first name should be spelled like its mirror image?  The weird thing is that even though Joe will respond to, say an email, and sign off as "Joe," people refuse to acknowledge that and continue to email him as "Jo."  And it's not just strangers.  Relatives too -- people who have known him all his life and are blood-related, for crying out loud.

Does this look like a "Jo" to you?

Wyatt's crushing hard.

Wyatt's got a crush. Her name is Penelope. She is the cutest little hapa girl you've ever seen. The problem is, everyone else thinks she's cute, too. It's been going on for over 2 years now (they started preschool together when they were 3) and he's already been tightening up his game.

Some things overheard...

Penelope: "Wyatt, can you help me with this?"

Wyatt: "First you have to answer a question. Who's your best friend?"

Penelope: "Um....Jai???"

Wyatt: "Ehhhh!!" (mimicking sound of a buzzer) "Wrong answer! Try again!"

Penelope: "Uhhh...you?"
Wyatt: "Right answer!"

Getting the all-important confirmation...

Wyatt: "Are you my girlfriend Penelope?"

Penelope: "Sure, I can be your girlfriend."

Wyatt:  "Well, you know that if you're my girlfriend, you're going to have to marry me."

And finally, putting the nail on that coffin...

Wyatt:  "Penelope, I love you because you're so pretty...and cute...When I look at you, my eyes turn to hearts." (Yes, he's for real!)

We're all a little scared about how this is going to turn out.  But we're also impressed.  Very impressed.

He looks so innocent. But he's got the moves of a well-trained 26 year old.

A Mutt is a Mutt

Hybrid dogs. Fancy name for mutt. Don't get me wrong, I like mutts. They're smart, amiable, and usually don't hump me. But hybrid dogs. And worse, hybrid dogs that involve the Beagle. As if they could mess with perfection.

So that is where I draw the line.  So puggle, I don't give a fuggle about you.

Purebred bitch.  With a dash of Snoopy.

You can read about this nonsense here.

Don't get the bitch mad.

So Dina's on a rampage. And luckily, Joe is not the victim, like usual. She bought something on Etsy. Something she never received. And something she never got a refund for.

She is maniacal now. Let's see, she's sent repeated emails to the seller, filed a complaint with Etsy, located the seller's personal address and phone number, located the seller's retail shop and phone, filed a consumer protection complaint with the County of the seller's hometown, filed a consumer protection complaint with the County of the shop, contacted PayPal, filed a claim with her financial institutions, is readying a small claims Complaint, and is even thinking of filing a diversity action in federal court just to fuck the seller.

I tell you, don't get that bitch mad. She'll cut your nuts off.

Look, here she is with the Jelly Bean man. Just before she stabbed him in the heart and ate him.

What, suddenly we're Chinese???

Ok, I'm not sure how it happened, but we suddenly became Chinese.  Maybe for Joe, who is really the first generation born here, he's always been Chinese.  Although his Mexican-Cambodian-Filipino-Laotion exterior suggests otherwise.  But I know for Dina, she's about as Chinese as fortune cookies.  

But suddenly, come Chinese New Year, we all got Chinese up in here.  I did a little intel, and this is how it went down.  

Wyatt goes to a Mandarin immersion school now, where he is taught 50% in English, 50% in Mandarin.  Chinese culture is part of the curriculum and so of course, he learned about Chinese New Year.  He comes running home, and asks Dina, "What are we doing to celebrate Chinese New Year?!!!"  Like any good parent does, Dina deferred to Joe and said "Let's wait until your Dad gets home to decide."  In the meantime, she Wikipedia'd "Chinese New Year."  Pulling her bullet points from that, she covered the basics.

They cleaned the house (well, not really.  Dina had the kids sweep the floor.  She might have used the dustbuster.  But Hilda and her daughter, our lovely housecleaners, were charged with the actual tasks of cleaning).  

They made dumplings.  This was surprising.  Dina actually knew how to make dumplings.  But she kind of cheated because she made wontons, instead of steaming actual dumplings (which would have required her to buy steam baskets).

She bought some mandarins with the leaves on, found some Angry Bird red envelopes (oh! the commercialization of Chinese New Year!!!), and even went to the bank to get crisp one dollar bills.  Oh, in case you're wondering about the cows, that's Brownie and Spot and they were visiting for the weekend from Landon's preschool.

They went to dim sum with a bunch of friends.  Of course, Wyatt later told Joe that it was the "worst day of his life," but the dim sum was pretty good.  Don't you love 5 year olds?

 They made cookies.  Oh wait, this has nothing to do with Chinese New Year.

They ate long life noodles.  Doesn't Landon look cute here?  You'd never know what a terror he is from this photo.

 And fresh fish, too.

 Everybody wore good luck red.

Well, whatever we are, Happy New Year, Gung Hay Fat Choy, Xin Nian Kaui Le and yadda yadda yadda.  Now, where's my red envelope, people???