JoeTo:
I finally found out what Joe's New Year resolutions are. They are impressive, they are all about self-improvement, and one in particular will surprise you with the sheer ambition of the goal.
Joe's resolutions:
1. To exercise. That is, not relying on playing hockey once a week, even if he sweats enough for the entire month during that one game. Trust me, he's got the hockey gear to prove it.
2. To watch his appearance. Now, you all may find this superficial. But what this really means is this: a. He will let Dina dress him, which will effectively lead to; b. not wearing the same shirt four days in a row (and yes, that includes work days).
3. To eat better, which presumably is another way of saying 'to slim down' (at least, in girl-speak, that's what it means). But for Joe, I think this means that lunches Monday-Friday do not consist of (and this is an actual list of lunches for Joe): Mon., BBQ joint; Tues., Red Robin; Wed., McDonald's; Thurs., Domino's; Fri., leftover Domino's.
And here is Joe's final resolution. It's ground-breaking. It's earth-shattering. It's Joe!
4. To brush his teeth and wash his face everyday.
Now seriously, do I even need to comment on that? Let's recall the guy is 32, not 3 or 2.
Dina:Ok, Dina could be worse than Joe. She barely even has any resolutions. She either thinks that she is perfect the way she is (can't be) or that there's no hope for her anyway so why even start trying (likely).
Dina's Resolutions Schmesolutions:
1. To get back to her exercise regimen. The previous wake-up-at-6 a.m.-to-drive-to-work-and-then-work-out-for-an-hour-and-a-half thing fell to the wayside a couple of months ago. I don't think she's planning on getting up at 6 a.m. anymore, but there's got to be some pilates mat class that won't laugh at her when she fails at doing the rolling with your legs tucked in like a frog thing.
2. To order wedding pictures. To scrapbook the past 4 years of photos. To clean the house. To train me to not pee on the carpet. To do some 'spring cleaning.' To reorganize the closets.
What is this, resolutions or a list of errands??? I mean, for crying out loud, there is some room for self-improvement, woman! How about keep in touch with friends better, be more patient, don't yell at me when I'm eating dirt, and stop friggin' playing with my ears. I'm supposed to look this way.
P.S. Incidentally, Joe and Dina each made a resolution for each other. Each time one breaks it, they have to give a buck to the other.
Joe's resolution for Dina: no muttering under her breath or rolling her eyes.
Dina's resolution for Joe: no getting pissed in the car (and that includes honking the horn).
It'll be easier for China and Taiwan to settle on the 1 country, 2 country thing than for these two to keep to these resolutions. But feel free to post a comment to say who's going to earn more money.
2 comments:
D - I love how you cram several resolutions under "2" - so if you don't do any of them, you're really only breaking 1 resolution, genius! As for who is going to win, that's a tough one - there are a lot of annoying drivers on the road, so Joe is going to have a hard time - but there are more annoying people walking around in the world that you're going to have to encounter, so I'm going to have to vote for Joe. I do however, think he'll forget to brush his teeth every day if that's any consolation ; )
TicTacTo, TnT dig your blog, a bit tripped out, but that probably goes without saying. I do want to mention that at one point during our collective viewing, tiny T burst out and said, "Joe has such a baby face! He still looks 15!" Anyway, that's your owner. Convince him to bring you to Utah. -TnT
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